In many counties around the U.S. school districts are offering free breakfasts to students under the theory that if you’re hungry then you aren’t at your best. They’re hoping to see an increase in grades and standardized test scores, especially in poor schools where students are often short on good scores and good meals. Will it work? I am sure it will, to some degree.

What I find so interesting is the extreme nature of the comments about these programs. Holy cow! People are angry about providing breakfast!

Here’s a sample (from here).

“And this is yet ANOTHER reason why I, as a teacher, have just moved to another county!”

“I, as a taxpayer am fed up with the PBC school board and their reckless squandering of my tax $$. If people want to have kids THEY should be forced to provide for them.” (Ed: There is definitely squandering…but not on this program!)

“Stop all FREE food programs (maybe we should teach the kids that there is no such thing as a FREE lunch, or anything else)”

“How scary is is that we allow the same people that bring us the IRS, DMV, and Social Security to TEACH OUR KIDS?!?!?!?” (Ed: Good point…it is scary!)

“Why should I as a taxpayer subsidize free breakfast for all?”

“The qualification for free breakfast/lunch is $26k for a family of four. Really, consider living on that w/2 children, or as a single parent w/3 children, and I would assume we have a parent who possibly leaves home before the children have breakfast. Judge not, that ye be not judged. Be grateful these children are being fed a nutritious breakfast, for they are probably in need.”

What do you think? Leave us a comment!

-Allen Dobkin

My friend’s son has Aspergers and wants to be a singer. The problem is it’s hard not to cringe when he sings. It is very soulful and when I listen to him I wonder if he isn’t into some kind of more evolved singing and the rest of us just can’t get it. I’m reminded of an old Twilight Zone for those less aged than I am, it was a popular science fiction show in the fifties) In this episode a woman is horribly deformed and has plastic surgery after plastic surgery. We await the results of the most recent attempt. The camera cuts to the woman in bandages, then pans away and we hear the pitying voices of the doctors bemoaning the surgery as a failure. The camera focuses on the woman who is drop dead gorgeous – played by a popular model of the time. It is then that we realize that we haven’t seen the faces of anyone, and that the doctors all look like pigs. I wonder if this isn’t a lot like living with Aspergers.

Tonight on NPR I heard an interview with Tim Page, a Pulitzer Prize winning music critic for the Washington Post with Aspergers. Robert Siegel was interviewing him because he had written a description of what it was like to grow up with Aspergers in the New Yorker Magazine. He called the article “Parallel Play”. He felt that the Aspergers led to a lifetime of “restless isolation” because he couldn’t connect with others in “normal” ways.

He said Aspergers was “a different way of processing information.” He was “obsessed with detail, with music and with old photographs. Throughout his life he has possessed an extraordinary memory for facts and data. However, he was oblivious to most social things and had to read Emily Post to learn how other people related to each other. Although he was praised for thinking outside of the box, he admitted that he often couldn’t even find the box.

“Aspergers is something that you never get over, but you learn to live with it.”

Tim Page has lived well and is an inspiration to others.

To hear a podcast of this story please go to:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=12750745

Ninah Kessler, LCSW
Life Coach

This morning I’m off for my first day as a teacher at an all-ADD private school. Students won’t be arriving until next Wednesday, but I am excited about the opportunity to work with them in a group as large as 15. That is 5-10 times more high-need students than I’m used to. I’m sure it will prove exciting. You can count on me to share my experiences and insights with you as the school year progresses.

One way this school has impressed me is the way that they handle academic goals as opposed to developing social skills. In my experience, parents will happily spend tens of thousands of dollars (if they can afford it) in order to remodel their kid’s report card, but the moment you tell them that this will help their child build social skills and make friends, the pocketbook goes under lock and key.

As students are processed for attendance at this school, the administration goes into detail with the parents about what the parents ultimately want for their child. Inevitably, the answer ends up revolving around independence, happiness and friends. This frees us up to work on those vital areas that ultimately decide the child’s fate.

If you are working with a challenged population of children, remember that a child can flunk out of high school and still become the founder and CEO of a major company. But even with straight A’s, a child with inadequate social skills won’t even be able to work as a janitor. Make sure you teach appropriately.

Good luck!
Allen Dobkin

The days are getting shorter. School is starting. Homework is coming. Arguments about homework generate anger and frustration for parents and children. It’s easy to understand the child’s perspective. They’re in school all day and then they are free – BUT WAIT – there is homework to do. As parents we know that homework not only gives the kids an opportunity to practice what they have learned in school but also teaches skills like organization and setting priorities that are essential in the “real” world. Not to mention the scholastic consequences of incomplete assignments

So how can we make it a little easier this year?

How much homework is too much?

Your child, especially a young child, shouldn’t be spending his life on homework. There needs to be a balance. The experts agree that a kindergartener or second grader shouldn’t be spending more than about 20 minutes a day on homework, and even older elementary school kids benefit most from spending an hour at most. After 4th grade, it is important that your child practice math, because since math builds on itself, deficits here can mushroom. When your child is in middle school more homework is appropriate.

If your young child is routinely spending hours completing his work, something needs to be done.

Simple Steps can help

There are some very basic things that we can do to make homework easier. You have probably thought of them but may not have gotten to implement them. Some simple steps from pediatrics.about.com include:

• Provide your child with a quiet, well lit place to do homework with materials such as pens and a dictionary available.
• Establish a set time for doing homework, not right before bedtime. Think about using a weekday morning or afternoon for working on big projects, especially those that involve working with others.
• Help your child figure out what is easy homework and what is hard homework. Encourage your child to do the hard homework first when he is most alert.

How much should I help my child with homework?

We all know that it is your child’s homework not yours. You want to give your child as much independence as you possibly can but if the child is floundering, you don’t want him to sink.

Even if your child is doing ok, it’s good to acknowledge him when he is doing his work and to reward any accomplishments. “Johnny, I like the way that you’re concentrating on your math problems.” “Wow, Helen, you worked really hard on your science project. Let’s celebrate with a trip to the park.” As important as acknowledgment and rewards are when your child is doing well, they are ESSENTIAL when your child is struggling

When your child is struggling.

If you child is spending 3 hours on 6 math problems or can’t organize his thoughts to write and essay (see our blog on how to write an essay), then you know there is a problem, and you need to find ways to intervene without taking over.

For example, if difficulty paying attention is the problem with the math, you can cut a whole in a piece of paper so your child only sees one math problem at a time. This is a very low tech solution, but some of the new technology can also be helpful. For example, there is a program called Inspiration (which Dr Rohn used to help teachers teach science) which maps out your thoughts. Once your child’s thoughts are mapped out, it’s much easier for him to write that essay. If writing itself is a problem, your child may benefit from typing his assignments on the computer.

You want to be available for your child, especially when they are having a hard time, because you don’t want them to get so frustrated that they don’t do their homework and then they fall behind in school.

When is the help you do too much? Remember that interference is when you do what the child could do by himself. Additional suggestions can be found at about.com or here.

My child says he finished his homework

Some children who are frustrated with homework will just tell their parents “I already did my homework” or “I don’t have any homework tonight.” In the old days the main way a parent could verify this statement was to work with the teacher to create a homework pad where the teachers would write down the child’s assignments. You could also call a friend.

While there is nothing wrong with this approach, today many teachers will post homework on a web site or will email assignments to parents.

When you need a professional

If there is a problem the first person to go to is your child’s teacher. It is important that parents and teachers can work together on this. The teacher may be able to make accommodations for the child. For example, the teacher may allow you to cut assignments short when the child is having an especially difficult time. If the child does not complete assignments because he can’t write, the teacher may allow you to write down your child’s answers. That relationship with the teacher apprises you of what’s going on, so you don’t get a big surprise at report card time.

The teacher might recommend a tutor, and there are many good ones out there. Sometimes the difficulty doing homework may reflect a deeper problem. For example, if your child just cannot focus or pay attention that could be the issue. Please take the free 39 point learning assessment at our website (SparksofGenius.com) to see if an attention or focusing issue is the problem.

Make sure the homework is in the backpack

My friend would sit down with her son night after night and go over his homework. Then he would forget to put it in his backpack and get an incomplete. She finally helped him organize his backpack and checked to make sure the assignment was there. It must have worked, because now he is going off to college to major in computers. He is a smart kid, just disorganized.

I hope that this makes homework a little easier. If you are frustrated, remember that you are not alone. Another friend of mine thought that having a child was like having a very intense cat. Boy was she wrong. Every problem has a solution, but that doesn’t mean that finding the solution doesn’t require some work. Hang in there and have a great school year.

By Ninah Kessler, LCSW
Life Coach

Tell them to Think of Their Brain as a Muscle

Research shows that students do better in school when they are told they can get smarter by training their brains to get stronger— like a muscle.

Article here.

Does your child see intelligence as something fixed or something expandable?

Students who think intelligence is fixed become preoccupied with whether they look smart or dumb. They also tend to avoid difficult tasks. |Not good!

But students who believe they can develop and expand intelligence usually like being challenged. They try harder, are more persistent and worry about making mistakes and looking dumb. This is good.

In one experiment of 12 year old students with similar math achievement scores, those with a fixed mindset did worse in math than those who were taught that the brain is a muscle. And, the gap between the two groups widened over the years.

Carol Dweck, a psychologist and researcher at Stanford University said:

“We taught them that the brain forms new connections every time they applied themselves and learned,” she explained. “It gave them a new model of how their minds worked, and how they had control of their brains and could make it work better. The idea is to free them from the tyranny of fear of looking dumb. The name of the game is learning.”

Students need to understand that their intellectual potential is not fixed. So do parents and educators.

Some games that exercise the brain to get stronger can be found here.

Moreover, there are many ways to be smart that are undervalued in school and at home—so-called multiple intelligences.

Students at Sparks of Genius learn that their brain forms new connections when they work hard to learn and learn. They also learn how to take full responsibility for learning buy controlling their mind and their brain to work better.

Sparks of Genius personal trainers use a high tech (software) high touch (character development) formula to help students train their brain for success

We identify, ignite and nurture many intelligences. It’s a great way to increase student achievement.

To learn more about your child’s learning potential

fill out the FREE 39-Point Learning Assessment now. http://sparksofgenius.com/screens.html.

Dr. Rohn Kessler

Forgetful?

Material must be attended to before it is possible to program it into your memory. Some ways to help you remember or cue yourself are: For a word or name try to go through the alphabet. Sometimes this will bring back the name or word you are looking for. To remember an event: try recalling all the events surrounding it.Try to remember it through someone else’s eyes. Try reversing the order of what happened. Think about the less important things like what someone was saying or wearing. Think about where you were when the situation you need to remember occurred. Often the scenery will cue another part of your brain to remember the missing piece and this will trigger your memory. Try to put yourself in the same mental, emotional atmosphere, this aids recall.

Lose things?

Find a special place for each object you don’t want to misplace. Always put them back in that same place. Have a list of where you put things so if you forget you can check the list. Say aloud where you are putting something and rehearse it in your mind. For some people it helps to visualize or take a mental snapshot of where you are putting something. Don’t take anything, particularly documents, anywhere where you do not need them. If you lose keys etc., attach them to yourself.

How to remember instructions!

Write them down or record them. Picture yourself doing each step of the task. Repeat instructions aloud and restate them to the giver of the instructions.

Solutions for following verbal instructions

Write it down! People in the CIA and even the president write things down. Buy a small digital recorder and record the instructions. If neither of these options is available say it aloud three times in your head. Repeat it back to the person giving instructions to affirm you have heard correctly

I get sidetracked.

Finish one task before embarking on the next, use a checklist and check it off so you know when it is time to move forward. It is okay to ask others nicely to let you finish what you were saying or doing so that you can give your full attention to them once you have completed your current task.

Hints to avoid foot in mouth syndrome!

Train yourself to watch for other people’s reactions. Your communication might be provoking tension. This is a good time to ask yourself if the trouble you are about to receive is worth the expense. Try changing the topic. There is no crime in not telling all or saying you feel this is not the right time for you to talk about it. Be calm. A soft answer turns away wrath.

I get distracted.

Chart your course before you start and assign the amount of time you are going to spend on the task at one sitting. Work in a noise free atmosphere when possible. Do one thing and finish it before you move to the next task.. Think of how to reward yourself for finishing. Start small to build success.

When things go wrong…Don’t go with them!

We hear a lot about brain damage being the “signature wound” of the Iraq war. In An Instant, the story of ABC new anchor Bob Woodruff, we get a good idea of the importance of keeping mentally fit. It also illustrates the resilience of the brain and neuroplasticity in action.

The scene is Bethesda Naval Hospital, January 31, 2006. Lee, Bob Woodruff’s wife, is speaking to the doctor in charge of her husband’s care. Only two days earlier Bob Woodruff was severely injured in Iraq by an IED (improvised explosive device).

The doctor is explaining why it is so important to use your brain to its maximum potential.
“If you are a person who sharpens pencils for a living and you have a brain injury, you will probably not have as many neurons from your former life to help rehabilitate yourself.

But if you are a person like Bob Woodruff, who is forty-four and has made great use of his brain in his life, speaks multiple languages, has an intellectual curiosity and abundant life experiences, you have a better shot as how well those neurons are going to reconnect.

Think of those neurons as a road – I-95 for example. If the only way your brain knows how to get from New York to Washington is along I-95, and a giant jackknifed truck closes all lanes of the highway, you are in trouble.

But if you are Bob Woodruff and you know alternate routes, you can take back roads or board Amtrak or hop on the shuttle flight at Reagan National. If you are a person who can come up with other solutions, who has really used your brainpower, (italics, mine) you have more chance to develop alternate pathways for cognitive function and reasoning and putting all those neurons back together again.”

There you have it. Don’t wait for head injury, stroke, or dementia; develop your brainpower to the maximum.